Pursuing Me with His All....

In the summer of 2003 I had a drastic life change - I went from believing that God did not even exist to loving Him with everything I had.  Many of you who know me know that when I do something, I go all out, and this was no exception.  Since that time I have made it one of my biggest priorities to have daily quiet time with God, praying and reading the bible.  And He has worked in me, changed me, and done so much through me during that daily quiet time, just me and Him.  

My relationship with God has looked so different in the last year.  With having Ava, trying to catch up on a year of sleep deprivation, and working around 80 hours a week, I just have not been able to find the time to be still and hear His voice for 30 minutes each day.  At first, I felt guilty and really missed that time; but God was faithful and He met me where I was.  And while I prayed and begged God to give me that time for Him, He comforted me and calmed me and told me that this was a season of change.  I was going through a different season of life, one where that 30 minutes was not possible, where work, and family, and sleep was necessary just to survive.  So He showed me where I had quiet time to spend with Him, like while I was nursing Ava or driving in the car.  That time did not look the same and wasn't exactly what I hoped for, but it was enough to carry me through.  He continued to show up in my life, and I never felt His presence leave me.  It was a tough year, but He carried me through it all....

So now that Ava is 1, and my new job has more "normal hours," it is another new time in my life. Everywhere I turn I see that He is pursuing me again, just like He did when I first gave my life to Him.  Showing me where I can have that quiet time again, showing me that He has plans for me and things in my life that He wants to work out.  Everywhere I turn - at church, in the bible, my devotions - they are all speaking the same thing: that He loves me dearly and wants to spend time with me.  That He has plans for me, big plans, and to do these things I need to be still and hear His voice.  I need to let Him work in me, change me, pursue me.  And I can't wait to see what He does next....

What I did on my very first birthday

In her "I'm the Birthday Girl" shirt from her aunt Nickie, and new Mary Jane's and ruffle socks from Grandma Patty.

We started with presents pretty much as soon as she woke up.  I was so excited to see her open them!  She wasn't quite sure what to do with the gifts at first, but when she realized that there were fun things inside, she squealed and was pretty excited.  I'll let the videos and pictures speak for themselves.

In the midst of the gifts.

Blocks.

Wait, there's more in there?

Just reach a little further....

Dinosaur that she LOVES - from Lisa and Chris.

Then it was off to daycare for the day.

They had even made a "Happy Birthday Ava" sign to welcome her. 
However, I am pretty sure this was her favorite part of the day:

Taking a walk and holding hands with her bestie, Amelia.  So stinkin' cute!!

She even got a musical card from Uncle John and Aunt Judy.  I think this was her favorite!!

Topped it off with a favorite dinner of chicken, blueberries, and soy yogurt, and some bathtime fun with her new cups, and it was a pretty good day!!

The Big 1

365 days.  52 weeks.  12 months.  1 year.  I can't believe that Ava's first birthday is here already.  Everyone says that it goes by so quickly, and they were so right. 

9/9/2010

9/9/2011

This birthday was so much more emotional for me than I ever imagined.  My baby is now a toddler, running around the house, saying her first words, and sometimes showing her little attitude.  I just can't believe that she has grown and learned so much in this last year.   All of these emotions came not only from realizing how big she is getting, how much she has changed, and how she is going to be 16 in the blink of an eye, but also from remembering what we have been through and thanking God for what a blessing she is in our lives. 

She has gone from being completely dependent on me for everything, to exploring everything around her.  The cashier at the store said it best today, "She has very busy hands and feet, doesn't she?"  Yes, yes she does. 

Practicing climbing the stairs, while showing off her new shoes and socks.

She is learning so much and is constantly taking in everything around her.  She has been like this since the hour she was born.  Usually when a baby is born they have a very awake period for an hour after birth, then they sleep most of the time for the next 2 weeks or so.  Not Ava.  After she was born she was wide awake, with her big blue eyes looking around at everything, taking everything in, for hours after she was born.  I never had to wake her to feed, as she was like an alarm clock - she would wake up from between 2 hours 54 minutes to 3 hours 7 minutes after her last feeding, ready to go.  When she was awake she would look around, like she was trying to figure out what everything was that surrounded her.  She loved to be held and talked to, and she hated to sleep unless she was in someone's arms.  Now, at a year of age she is finally falling asleep on her own, taking naps that are over an hour long, and sleeping through the night (well, I consider waking at 5 am to eat and going right back to sleep through the night).  She still loves to cuddle, and often stops to give Josh and I hugs when she plays.  This morning when I went to get her from her crib, she looked up at me with those big blue eyes, stretched out her arms and said "Mama."  Oh, that girl knows how to melt my heart. 

Miss Sassy-pants herself, dancing in the kitchen while dad sings "Happy Birthday."

I think the part that really overwhelmed me today was thinking back on how I prayed for her, that I asked God every day for so long to bless us with a child.  I knew He had a plan for us, although I couldn't see it and I often wondered what that plan was actually going to be.  To see His plan fulfilled, this beautiful, perfect little girl that He has entrusted us with - it is so much better than I could have imagined.  When I look at her I see how very much God loves me, and it overwhelms me. 
Life is so different now than it was a year ago.  Wonderful, amazing, and always an adventure, but not always perfect and sometimes just plain tough.  But we survived, and I have so many amazing and beautiful memories (and hundreds of photos!) to prove it.

Too excited to celebrate at school today!

 Happy 1st Birthday Ava Eloise - mommy and daddy love you more than you will ever know!

A Labor(less) Weekend

Currently I am finishing out my residency with a board study month, which essentially means that I go to clinic a half day a week and study the rest of the time.  As a bonus, I have my weekends off!

 

Doesn't she look like a toddler??!

Miss Ava and I took a quick 2 day trip home to see Grandma and Grandpa Pasek.  Grandma gave Ava some pots and pans to play with.

 

We visited my Uncle Bill and Aunt Sharon's lake house.  What a beautiful, relaxing place to go!  The flowers were beautiful -

 And Grandma just had to teach Ava how to throw rocks into the lake!

 And she snuggled right up to Uncle Bill after all of her exploring was done.  So sweet!

Due to 8 teeth coming in at once, we didn't sleep much this weekend and didn't make it to church on Sunday.  We were pretty sure that we would have been called right back to the nursery to pick her up.  No amount of ibuprofen, tylenol, teething tabs, frozen washcloths, and teething necklaces touched it.  (Thankfully it has passed and she is now sleeping better than before!)

Sunday was BFF Amelia's first birthday party!  Of course we couldn't miss it.  We all had a great time enjoying the beautiful weather and great friends.  Everyone enjoyed the cake (what a great idea - it looked like the stacking rings Amelia loves!) and watched Amelia as she discovered a new love of frosting!

Amelia explaining to Ava how yummy cake frosting is, and how it will be Ava's turn very soon!

Sassy party clothes, complete with glittery shoes.

On Labor day we took advantage of the beautiful weather and took a trip to DeAnna Rose Farmstead.  This was Josh's first trip, and he was pretty impressed.  Ava loved the animals, and running around wherever she could.

Baby cow (or as Josh points out, a calf)

The hands-down favorite?  Ringing the cowbells.  

Yes, the goat is eating her hat.

 And, of course, a little playground time.  She loves the slide now!

 

What a great family weekend together - now back to reality.  Josh is full throttle into football season, and I am planning Ava's party and studying for my board exam like crazy!

Blog Hiatus

It's been almost 4 months since my last blog, and that's just way too long.  It started with business at work, and then I became overwhelmed by the number of things I wanted to blog about....our trip to Branson, Father's day, finishing residency, all the amazing things that Ava is doing...now I've just decided to start over with today and go from here. 
And hopefully I will be able back-blog when I have a chance.  I guess we'll see.
So here it goes....